Author Archives: jbronson

Zombies Win Clapper Award

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clapper awardThe San Gabriel Valley Theater Assoc. has just awarded our Zombie Players Association the 2015 Clapper Award of Excellence for its annual series of Halloween productions.

Accepting the award, our founder, playwright, and producer, Val Luten.  His acceptance speech surprised the gathering, “We don’t want your stinking award.  We want your fresh brains.”  The audience of over 200 attendees gave him a standing ovation.  It seems the crowd respected Luten for ‘putting it to the man’.  They all agreed that we need more fresh brains with new ideas to promote live theater.

DISCLAIMER:
The above is the product of a delusional zombie mind, although it does identify the problem of theater failing to use imagination to attract a younger audience that is addicted to electronic/social media.  They are missing the live theater experience; the real 3D.

Free Family Portrait

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Award-winning photographer volunteers to help playhouse for third year.

Beverly Widney of Bev Widney Photography will again offer free photos to all who attend the playhouse’s Halloween show.  This year’s photo will be taken with
“Zombie Marilyn.”

Photos will be e-mailed to your address.

This is a child-friendly event.

For more info, contact Bev at bevwid@earthlink.com or see her website at
www.BevWidneyPhotography.com

Police Protection League Wants National Guard Called In

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Ann Savage, spokesperson for the Sierra Madre Police Protection League, today asked the Sierra Madre City Council to call in the National Guard to supplement our police force on Halloween night.  “There is no way our police department can defend our town from a bus load of flesh eating zombies,” she said.

Warden G, from the Zombie Correctional Institution, told the city council that he was providing 25 specially trained guards to police the Halloween show.  “Celebrity Zombies Save America” will feature actual zombies from his institution.  “My guards know how to handle these creatures.  It’s their job 24 hours a day.  I can guarantee you that there will be no problem from my inmates.  No Sierra Madre police officers will be needed at the Sierra Madre Playhouse on Halloween night.”

The council agreed that no extraordinary measures were needed for the Sierra Madre Playhouse show, “Celebrity Zombies Save America”, on Halloween night.

L.A. Times Theater Critic Missing

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A well dressed, middle-aged gentleman with thinning gray hair and a ship’s anchor tattooed on the back of his right hand approached the playhouse last Saturday.  He claimed to be a free agent theater critic on assignment for the L.A. Times.  He was given a pass to see the first dress rehearsal of the new show, “Celebrity Zombies Save America.”  Fellow viewers reported that he laughed so hard that he started to cry.  After the show was over, he enthusiastically went back stage to interview the players.  He was never seen again.  The shows producers contacted the L.A. Times.  The Times refused to comment on whether or not one of their critics was missing.

The producers of “Celebrity Zombies Save America” have decided to post an armed guard in the actors lounge during all performances for the public’s protection even though there is no evidence of foul play.

Public Announcement

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Sierra Madre Board of Health okays cast and crew of “Celebrity Zombies Save America.”  Zombie virus not found.  Show is safe for the whole family.

Caution: Bald men, do not let zombies touch your head or you may leave the theater as a ‘no-brainer.’

Script

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Aug. 12, 2013 – Playwright, Val Luten and parties agree on script for new show, “Celebrity Zombies Save America”.  Val Luten says, “My zombies are really funny. No child will be traumatized.  No adult will be able to keep a straight face.