Broadway Bound

Zombie Memorial Players production “Romeo and Juliet at Zombie High School”, has drawn interest from two important Broadway production companies.

The 20 minute musical comedy will be repeated every half hour from 6:30 to 9:30PM, Halloween night only.

An expanded version of the play is being considered for an off-Broadway tryout. Those in the know tell us that this could be the next big show, “Zombies on Broadway.”

This Halloween night may be your only chance to see the original.  Better yet, this special family show is free, no tickets needed.  The show is rated F.N.G., Funny Not Gory.  Join us at the Sierra Madre Playhouse for brain-tingling excitement!

Disclaimer: Without direct contact from New York, the officials at the playhouse cannot confirm the above story, but it can’t help but confirm that the theater’s new commitment to the highest quality, American plays has made the Sierra Madre Playhouse, pound for pound, the best theater in Los Angeles.

Zombie Attacks Homeowner

When arrested by officer Whitey Whitehead of the Sierra Madre Police Dept., the livid, overexcited, zombie explained, “I saw him watering his lawn on Tuesday instead of Wednesday.”

In response, the homeowner said, “My lawn was turning brown:  I guess I just panicked.”  To which, the officer Whitehead replied, “Brown is the new green.”

Zombie Virus Cure

Center for Disease Control announced today that a vaccine developed by the Zombie Research Facility has ended the threat of the Zombie virus.

It must be noted that this is the third such announcement in the past 5 years.  The first 2 proved to be overly optimistic in that they only protected vegetarians and all humans age 95 or older.  The spokesman, dressed in a full hazmat suit, told reporters that the public still needs to wear bite-proof helmets when leaving their fortified homes.

Free Family Portait

Award-winning photographer volunteers to help playhouse for a fourth year.

Bev Widney  Beverly Widney of Bev Widney Photography will again offer free photos to all who attend the playhouse’s Halloween show.  This year’s photo will be taken with
“Zombie High’s Prom Queen.”

Photos will be e-mailed to your email address.

This is a child-friendly event.

For more info, contact Bev at or see her website at

Old Yellow Stain

old-yellow-stainMr. Krumpky, principal of Zombie High School, denied that the Zombie Complex that includes the Education Center, the Medical Research Facility, and the Zombie Correctional Institution is responsible for the sudden yellow tinge found in the city of Sierra Madre’s drinking water.

Krumpky handed the press copies of a report issued by the Federal Drug Administration concluding that the contents of Zombie water facilities used for storage, waste, and drinking water are pure in color and taste and contain no unusual chemicals.  In fact, nothing was found that would affect water color.

Krumpky concludes that the charge that the Zombies were responsible for the yellow stain was used by local politicians, who have failed to protect the public, to shift the blame away from themselves.  Most likely the high profit bottle water industry started the story to scare consumers into buying their expensive product.